NEW DELHI

I miss the sense of humour, miss the punjabi/delhi culture, miss the everyday arguments with the so called aggressive north Indian delhiites, miss the food, miss north campus, miss school, miss friends, miss my cricket, miss d typical delhi chicks (who would wear those brilliant earings with a spaghetti one day and the same earnings with a kurta the next day).

Miss to abuse in hindi (d typical delhi/punjabi way), yes, its pronounced as bhanc..d and not bhenc..d (as in Maharashtra) and even better if it is pronounced as bhandc..d (with a stress on bhand....), miss the Delhi Police haryanvi accent.

I miss the heat, miss the cold. I miss home, I miss Delhi.

Came accross this article on Delhi written by an IITian. Like it or not, this is DELHI for you.

Delhi – Ensemble of Power, Culture, Attitude and Modernity

Great cities are never built. They evolve! Today London, New York, Sydney and Shanghai are said in the same breath when you discuss the modern cities, actually great cities of the world. As India joins the high table of G-10, there will be a compulsion on it to showcase a city which lives up to the international standards. And going by whatever we have, it will be either Delhi or Bombay (Mumbai). But there is just one fundamental problem with India, or Indians. The Delhietes and Mumbaikars lack the passion for their cities, the sense of belongingness to their city and the proud feeling of living in a mega city seldom show in them. This I guess is what actually pulling these two cities down on the world map. This is especially true for Delhi. Often people (mostly Mumbaikars) compare Delhi with Mumbai, looking down upon Delhi most of the time as a city that is in the clutches of bureaucracy, and has no nightlife, and party crowd.

A city with pathetic sense of fashion and culture (read art et al). This kills me. Being a Delhiete for more than 20 years now, and having seen most of it, from the interiors to the exteriors, the suburbs and the nightlife, fashion circuit to Page 3 people, I feel Delhi has evolved and today has the finest of everything. The boring bureaucracy is confined to their traditional avenues which today are no longer hip and happening. Today Delhi boasts of the best nightlife in India, is undoubtedly the fashion capital, along with a true mixture of culture and modernity.

Power Symbol

Delhi being the capital obviously smells of power. It is a general saying that till you know the prime minister himself (or madam, in today's scenario); your contacts really don't matter. I have friends whose folks are bureaucrats. They tell me stories about how their dad while they were posted at obscure places in Bihar and Rajasthan, were treated with utmost respect, and how their say was the last word, even though they were at under secretary level. Ever since they got promoted and got posted in Delhi, they are literally nobody. That's the beauty of Delhi.

The echelons of power are huge here. There are always people above you who could compel you to bend and change the game. An IAS may sometime have to bow to his own chaprasi who happens to know the minister above him. The minister shall bow to the cabinet mantris. And they should do as PM wishes else there will be a reshuffle. Sometime the PM follows the Madame. One thing I love about this place is that it keeps these so called Civil servants to their knees.

Traversing through Central Delhi is always a pleasure. You get the feel of being in the Capital of country. My favorite spots being the Raisana Hill road where you get to see the Rashtrapati Bhavan, North Block and South Block and Parliament; Akbar road with all those grand Lutian's Delhi bungalows where you dream to live one day, Supreme court, UPSC building, RBI and Race course road. All these spots are unique if you see them in India's perspective and yet so common to an average Delhiete. And still people say that Bandra (Shah Rukh) and Juhu (Amitabh) attract the maximum tourists.

Bureaucracy has its own status and social culture in Delhi. And they have certain well defined spots for that. To get a feel of it, India Habitat Center located at Lodhi Road is the place you need to be. You can bump into India's well known IAS and IPS officers having a gala time (read enjoying expensive malt scotch with so called high class social girls) here. No need to get perplexed! Most bureaucrats here command respect from the common man and have no qualms in flaunting their accumulated riches. Their wives are regularly seen enjoying at Ashoka's lounge or passing their free time as working for NGOs (another social time pass avenue). Their kids go to the most high class schools some of which accept only kids (brats) of bureaucrats. And politicians are no different. Whether serving in government or sitting in opposition, they don the most expensive Versace and Rolex, and ride only the 'i' series and 'S Class'. In Delhi the going is clear – "You got it, flaunt it!" Some other places where you can meet the famous lawyers, judges, politicos, and civil servants are Lodhi garden and Nehru Park. Located in pollution free zone of NDMC area, they provide just the ambience the high headed guys need for the morning walk along with their poodles and hounds.

Culture and Attitude

Delhi is a cosmopolitan city in true sense. Unlike Mumbai, which in spite of having a large chunk of migrated population still has its native population of Marathi, Delhi has no natives. Delhi became home to anyone who migrated here. And this can be seen in the geographical divide of Delhi. There is no segment that constitutes the majority here. Yet there are some zones in Delhi where the establishment is such that a particular clan outnumbers others. Like CR Park for Bengalis, Lajpat Nagar and Karol Bagh for Punjabis, Moti Bagh for Kannadas and every nick and corner for Biharis. But you get the flavor of mixed culture in this city. The other aspect of culture in Delhi comes from its obsession of categorizing people in economic classes. The High Cass, Upper and Lower Middle Class, the Low Class, and maybe the NO Class.

While the culture distinction based on religion or region hardly matters, considering the Cosmo mindset of the people, the economic distinction and class distinction is something Delhi loves. Delhi loves to show off. Delhi loves to flaunt. And Delhi loves to contempt. And if there is any culture that totally defines Delhi, it is this. People do things for the heck of it, for being at the right place at the right time. And Delhi loves brands, as well as branding others.

Delhi sure has one thing. The attitude! Stuff like the car you drive and locality you live are the most important aspect of the statement you make in Delhi. Nobody cares if you are a millionaire until you drive a car that's D segment and above. And yes 'men drive' as the saying goes 'men love hot wheels' even if they hate it or if it takes your guts out to traverse through the clumsy traffic while the 'chauffer' (no drivers, we are Delhietes) drives the memsahib wayward to her NGO work or the boutique she runs. A house having an address of GK or Vasant Vihar is what everyone aspires even it means that you have to make do without water and electricity for 10 hours or bearing pollution due to traffic on adjacent roads all the time. Another concept doing rounds these days is based on this aspect only. People have started moving to the so called "soothing", "serene" and calm locations away from busy locations. This means extra travel to most accessible places. But hey that's the price you have to pay to live there. That's why we see locations like Mayur Vihar, Noida and Gurgaon buzzing with real estate activities.

To get noticed in Delhi you and your family should follow some preset standards. That's what gives you class, style and what not. Apart form your address and wheels, what matters most is your occupation. The more power and contacts you can leverage from that, the better. So the most respected of them are Real Estate Businessman, Politician, Lawyer, Bureaucrat, Dalal (yes pimp!), Drug peddler and Havala dealer. There is one section of the society, the young and the new breed, basically the children of people I mentioned above, who consider these careers as boring et al. They go for the new upcoming career options like Rockers (Man this place is buzzing with it), RJs, VJs, DJs and anything that gives easy money and free dope. A job in MNC is considered fine but that's all it is. It's neither hip with the youngsters (another way of saying that I can't get it so it's boring and stuffy, and 9 to 5 etc.) nor as paying as Lawyers.
Delhietes also consider the school and college in which their children go as a prestige issue. I very well know that some of the best high class schools like DPS (R.K. Puram and Mathura Road), Modern (Bara and VV) and Goenka are hunting grounds for dope agents, even though they might have good academic record (none, except RKP though, it's all bloated truth). Still I see hopeful parents queuing for nursery admissions every year outside the portals of these schools. Why? They guarantee social status for 14 straight years. They can live off it for this long. Sure it's worth a try then. And when it comes to college, no it's not IIT that makes statement. It's sending your child to US! If it's Ivy League, then nothing compares to it. A kid is intelligent not because he can make it to IIT but if he gets a SAT score which his mom can flaunt. JEE is a passé. It's SAT and GRE that rules. Who cares about IIT/IIM anyways? They are not the place where you can make contacts with parents of other spoilt brats, which is possible if the college happens to be St. Stefan's. Everyone from Gandhi's to Dixit's sent their generations to this college after all. If your son makes friends with Narayanamurthy of tomorrow in IIT then, he makes friends with Rahul Gandhi of tomorrow in Stefan's.

Even school going boys and girls have to adhere to culture norms. Ever since the famous MMS scandal rocked the city, kids in school, starting from class 9 are under immense pressure to loose their virginity as soon as possible. You can spot kids bunking school, coming to Pizza Hut or Mac just to change their uniforms or maybe for some quick oral action. This kind of pressure was always there but off late, it has become some kind of American Pie like maniac.

When everyone has a culture attitude, then how can we forget the liberated women of Delhi? Professional or housewife, she is always pressed for time. And no she never watches the K soaps, and makes it a point to contempt them when she hangs out (yes! She hangs out). A housewife's job is really difficult these days, especially when you have social status at prestige. You have to make those parlor trips, work out at gym, take your pet to saloon and yes, there is that NGO you work for. Delhi's obsession with NGOs can be estimated from the fact that there are as many NGOs for AIDS as the registered patients. It used to be those Kitty parties earlier, which were termed as wasting your husband's money. Women empowerment, a jargon in itself, led to jargons like productive work for slum children and sex workers, and today NGO is an agency to canalize your time and energy for betterment and shit like that, when in reality its nothing more than a place where you go and hang around, discussing crap like what's hot in the party circuit etc.

Party, Drinks and Drugs

We are Delhietes. 'We work hard and party harder'. Delhi is always rocking as far as party circuit is concerned. And party circuit doesn't contain only the plush lounges, but the happening crowd. Who said only Bombay rocked at night? Delhi has the crowd. Sure, it was missing some time ago. But, the advent of new lifestyles and boom in BPO industry based in Delhi suburbs, Gurgaon and Noida, gave rise to hectic lifestyles where the youth has money for good times, but time is constraint.

Delhi has the best discotheques, restaurants, bars and lounges in India. Only a few in Bombay can compare to Delhi's vivid variety. You have specialty bars, lounge bars, and coyote bars in Delhi. Coming to discotheques, Elevate at CSM by weekends is the biggest in Asia. You get the best music there with DJs from all over world mixing there. Then again you have Agni at Park, Tapas at Intercontinental, Ssteel at Maurya and Le Brasserie at Meridian providing the best ambience and exclusive range of cocktails which include the latest dead scorpion chewing, nipple licking cocktails (you lick the drink spread over the nipples of a women, minimum size required at elevate being 32 C) and blowjob cocktails (counterpart of nipple cocktails, minimum being an erect 5 inch). But, discos these days are a passé. They are only for the below 30 genre.

The 30+ prefer the soothing environment of lounges. And sure Delhi has host of them. Athena, DV8, Geoffrey's, Mocha, Rick's, F, Nasha! You name it, we have it. Vodka bars, tequila only, coyote, coffee and what not. This city has them all. And that's not it. Delhi is obsessed with the new designer drugs. Everything is made available at these lounges if you can handle the cost factor. From the very fine verity of cocaine (.25 mg grain! Yes you get it here at 5000 per gram), ecstasy pills (just 1000 per pill), speed shots to acid (all of them, tongue and twist), everything is available. You can even get company for the night. Party crowd here is ready to mingle. And hotels don't make a fuss about it. Some may even help you if you are lonely. All you need is to tell the lift man that you need a 'complete' massage in 'your room'. There is a lot of verity to choose from. You get everything, the college girls, Arabic babes, hot Russians and the chinks. Some 'mousers' may be ready to accompany you to parties to 'entertain' your friends at a little extra cost.